To post or not to post.

Prepare for a long but important and serious post.

When I started blogging, it was a way for me to talk about things that I couldn't discuss with people in my life. Issues I have with family, friends, personal parts of myself. It was an online diary. A place where I could truly be myself and not be judged. If someone didn't like my blog, they didn't have to read it. Most of my interests, my belief system and who I am is not mainstream. While some people enjoy what I have to talk about, others choose to mock and ridicule and I just don't want to deal with their negative backlash. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all and leave my blog, please.

You may have noticed that I don't talk much about friends and I've been keeping my blog a bit more on the surface than what I used to. There are many reasons for this. One is that I've come to realize that people I know in real life may visit my blog once in awhile. I wouldn't want them to be hurt by the way I feel about things even though it would be nice to talk to them about it. Unfortunately, I've tried talking to certain people in the past and they didn't want to discuss these things. Most people I know would rather pretend something never happened and move on. I'm the type that wants to talk things out and resolve them as long as both parties are being rational. I've been editing my past blog content to eliminate things that may hurt someone or bother them. I've saved all the info and may open a private blog someday to be able to talk about these things.

About two weeks ago, I had a situation happen with a fellow blogger. I wasn't going to mention it on here because I felt the best way to deal with the situation was to move on and not waste my energy on this negativity. Yesterday, this person decided to start stuff up again and now I feel like I have to address it here.

I won't be saying who it is or what blog is theirs because that's just starting trouble. I will say it's a "she" but that doesn't give anything away because most of my readers are female. Nothing I say in this post will attempt to give away their identity.

This person started out as a friend that I met through the blog world. Eventually we began to communicate through email, postal mail and by phone. After awhile, I realized this was not someone I wanted to be friends with. There were many reasons that I decided this and I won't talk about them here because I don't want to give away this person's identity. I'm not that mean. I had tried to talk to this person and explain some of the things that were bothering me. Unfortunately, they didn't understand where I was coming from and I knew that things would never change. It was at that point that I decided to just end the friendship. I did this through email clearly stating the reasons why I was doing it because I didn't want to end the friendship and not have them know why. I didn't feel that I was harsh but the email I got back shocked me.

She attacked my character, my art/crafts and things about me that I had shared on this blog. She swore, called me names, etc. It was not the response I was expecting. I thought we could handle this like adults but obviously not. Think about personal parts of yourself that you have only shared with a couple people. Now imagine those people mocking what you shared. It's a low blow and not necessary when it has nothing to do with why the friendship ended. I wish I could explain in words how cruel this person was trying to be to me.

I recently did a post on how short life is. I choose to rid myself of negative people/situations whenever it is possible. Life's too short to deal with the bullshit. This is why I wasn't even going to post about the situation at all. Yesterday, this person began posting anonymously on my blog. I had a feeling it was her because of the location that showed up in my Feedjit and she was typically coming from her blog. I responded to her comments cautiously, in case it was her. Then she emailed me last night and I knew for a fact it was her because the email address had her boyfriend's info in it. Plus the "story" that she tried to recreate for this anonymous identity didn't add up. I responded to that email carefully. I received an email back where she confirmed who it really was and then she proceeded to start attacking me again. I really wish I could show you all how horrible the emails were but I won't do that. It's catty and immature and would give away who this is. Needless to say, I have not and will not ever respond to her emails that are of that nature.

A couple weeks ago, when our friendship ended, she had said she would never visit my blog again. Well, I could tell that she was visiting based on Feedjit and then her anonymous postings happened and she also started deleting negative comments that she had left on my blog before. I know that she'll probably read this. If so, I want to say...

Just leave me alone! Please, move on and stop with everything. Stop attacking my character and making me into this person that I'm not. Enough with the lies. Please use your energy on more positive things. There are so many causes in the world that you could be spending your time and energy on. Our friendship is done and you know why so don't try to make it into something it's not. Just stop.

Alexander Jansson

I've shared some of Alexander Jansson's work before and found a few more pics in my archive that I wanted to share. I find his work to be beautiful, dark and magical.

This piece is titled Dimanche.

Geraldine

Under The Surface

Life is short.

I was back near my hometown last night. I don't get over there very often and figured I'd swing by the local cemetery to grab a couple pics. My cousin's headstone is in the cemetery I went to.

Ben died sixteen years ago in a car accident at the age of 18. From what I remember (I was 14 years old), the accident happened the week before his high school graduation. His girlfriend was driving them home from school and I believe they were following friends. They were driving on a curvy road and Ben's girlfriend lost control of the car and they went into a corn field. Ben's girlfriend was wearing a seat belt. He wasn't.

There are many images from that accident and the week after that I will never forget. There is one that I will mention here. The local news was doing a story on the accident and one of the pictures they took was of the corn field and school books were scattered around. It was just so sad.

Ben's brother accepted his high school diploma on his behalf. I can't imagine what that must have felt like for him. He was closer to my age. Now that I think about it, he must have relived that moment when he accepted his own diploma years later.

When my cousin was buried, they had one of his senior pictures engraved on the front. I've shared pictures of his headstone and others below.

Please remember to buckle up when you drive. It could be the difference between life and death.

A random headstone pic. I loved the effect at the top of it.

Another random pic.

My cousin's head stone with one of his senior pics etched in.

The poem etched into the back of my cousin's head stone.

To dump or not to dump?

I was going to do something I've never done...a link dump. I've decided against it though. Instead, I'm going to be giving you gothy/creepy/cool stuff to check out over days instead of throwing it all in one post. Some things just deserve more attention than a link dump. :)

The first find is:


This company specializes in perfume oils and they have some pretty unique options. Below are some of the scents I came across.

June Gloom 2009 - Bright summer flowers, fresh herbs, and a bit of citrus rind dampened by the scent of morning mist and rain.

Pink Plastic Flamingo - Pink sugar-crusted marshmallows, dandelion, and sap.

Blood - Essence of dragon's blood resin, thickened with myrrh and cherry, with a trickle of clove.

Burial - The Dark Side of Earth: deep, brooding forest scents, including juniper and patchouli. The scent of upturned cemetery loam mingling with floral offerings to the dead.

They even have scents based off of Neil Gaiman's work as well as Alice In Wonderland scents. The March Hare smells like "A twisted teatime tart: apricot and sweet clove". Yum!

According to their Web site, they open an actual shop on every full moon. If that falls on a weekday, they open from 7pm to 10pm. Sounds magical, eh? They do tend to joke a bit on their site so not sure if that part is true. This part is true, however...

With the exception of the products that contain honey, their items are vegan. They are all cruelty free. This is the best part, in my opinion.

They do tend to be a bit pricier but that's because you're getting a concentrated oil, they use really good ingredients and don't test on animals.

The second find I have to share is for all you gamers out there. I was closing out of a game the other day and saw this ad. I thought it was fake but when I looked it up online, it was real and pretty freakin' awesome. Check it out...


You can get Mana and Health potions. They're energy shots that are stocked full of vitamins! To get more info on what they're all about, click here. I plan on buying some once I have some moolah to spend.

More cool finds to come soon!

Sunday Stealing: The Finish The Sentence Meme

This meme brought to you by:


1. I've come to realize that my last kiss... was with a person I will never forget.

2. I am listening to...this beautiful music...



3. I talk... in my head more than I do out loud. Typically I'm the listener in conversations.

4. I love...many things and hate very few.

5. My best friend/s...love me for who I am, not for who they think I should be.

6. My first real kiss...was with a boy who I still see occasionally. I remember putting Dr. Pepper chapstick on before kissing him. Silly, the things that we remember.

7. Love is...complicated, yet so simple at the same time.

8. Marriage is...an arrangement I do not wish to enter into.

9. Somewhere, someone is thinking...how many licks DOES it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

10. I'll always...be true to myself and get rid of negativity in my life, if it is within my power.

11. The last time I really cried was because...some people have truly hateful souls. Some people don't care about hurting people/animals and think that they have a "right" to do it because they are better than them. They think by bringing someone/something down that they bring themselves up. It does just the opposite, in my book.

12. My cell phone...kicks ass. It's black with a blue light up LED.

13. When I wake up in the morning...I think about what has to be done that day.

14. Before I go to bed...I put lotion on. I've read that it's best to moisturize at night when your body is resting. Not sure if it's true but I love falling asleep to soothing scents.

15. Right now I am thinking about...having to work tonight. It's hot out!

16. Babies are...fine for other people but not for me!

17. I get on Myspace...when a friend sends me a message. I just don't use it like I used to.

18. Today I...finished reading the latest issue of Gothic Beauty magazine. Great issue, as usual.

19. Tomorrow I will be...well rested cuz' I don't have to work. :)

20. I really want to be...a piano player as well as many other things. One day at a time.

An award and cemetery pics!

Halloween Spirit over at the Orange and Black blog has awarded me the Gourdqueens Scream Award. What a fabulous looking award it is! Thanks, friend!


According to her post, this particular award is to be shared with anyone whose blog you just love. Whether it's their art, their interests, the things they share, you just simply love to visit their blog.

Some of the people who I list below may have already gotten this award before. I'm trying to pick those that haven't gotten it yet though. If you've gotten this award before and you're on my list, this just means you've been Super Awarded! So without further adieu and in no particular order, I bestow this award on the following bloggers.

Cindy @ Twas The Brillig
Chris @ Frog On The Pumpkin
Diane @ Good Mourning, Glory!
Diane @ Wouldn't You Like To See Something Strange?
Catherine @ Suburban Vampire
Laura @ Laura and Her Favorite Things...

Yes, Diane is listed twice. That's cuz' she has two very different blogs that I like for different reasons. : ) Thanks to all of you for having wonderfully interesting blogs!

Now for a few of the cemetery pics that I took the other night. Enjoy!





UPDATE 6/23/2009: PumpkinBrain awarded me the Gourdqueens Scream Award too! Thanks!

Peace!

I was out and about today and as I'm driving, I happen to notice a giant peace sign in someone's yard. I was on the phone at the time and had way too much to get done so I went back tonight because I had to take a pic. It's not every day you see something like this! While I had my camera, I decided to grab some other shots. I took some at a local cemetery but those will be on a future post. Enjoy!

There is an ironworkers factory downtown and this is one of the big metal piles in their yard. It was all shiny in the sunset's rays.

Outside of the factory, they have a bunch of metal sculptures.

I don't think I've ever seen one continuous cloud like this?

The anticipation was killing me!

I've been wanting to share a pic of a recent project I completed for my blogging friend, Diane. It's a belated birthday gift. Really belated! I wanted to keep it a surprise so I refrained from posting a pic here that she would see. : ) Below is what I made for her. I painted the frame silver hoping that was pretty neutral for her decor. Cute, eh? To check out her very sweet blog post about it, visit Diane here.


Check out these cool miniature coke bottles I won from a giveaway! They came all the way from Singapore! I think that's the farthest away I've ever gotten mail from. Very cool. They came from a lady named May who makes the cutest tiny things. To check out her blog, click here. Thanks, May!

Two more awards for my corkboard!

I got the Makes My Heart Smile award from Cindy @ Twas the Brillig and the Slithy Toves.


She said I made her smile when she saw my crafts. Awww. That makes ME smile. : )


I got the Love Ya award from Eve @ Through Eve's Looking-Glass.


This award is bestowed on to blogs that are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Please give more attention to these writers.

Thanks to both of you for the awards!

Updated post.

Just a quick note to say that I updated the bookmarks post with better pics. My camera likes taking outdoor pics better than indoor ones!

It was a learning experience.

My first craft show wasn't all I hoped it would be. We got there an hour early to set up and we were originally told there would be 75 spots reserved and that the craft show was going to be in one side of the park and a fleamarket on the other side. Then we found out that there were only going to be 35 crafters total. After all was said and done, only 12 spots were filled with crafters and then 3 with fleamarket stuff. It ended up raining half the time so I don't know if people cancelled because of the rain or what.

There was a historic home tour going on during the time of the craft show, which brought in people but most of them had white hair and weren't interested in the kinds of crafts I brought. That may sound bad but it was true. I only had one younger girl come by and she thought the frames were cool but she didn't have any money cuz' she didn't have a job. (She was someone that was there selling fleamarket stuff.)

I had a booth with my cousin and she ended up bringing a ton of garage sale items, which I didn't know about. When we had originally talked about the setup, I was going to bring a card table for my stuff and she was going to have a couple card tables and a long table for her stuff. She said she was going to have one box of garage sale items and that her long table would go lengthwise so that we'd share the front of the booth. When we got there and looked at the setup, she decided to put her long table along the front, which seemed okay at the time because I could put my card table on the side and I figured I'd get traffic from that side and people would see my stuff when they were walking by the front.

She ended up having huge displays on the front table that blocked my stuff pretty much completely. (Pic below.) She had three sides of the booth and two of the sides were along the sidewalk so they got most of the attention. All in all, I had maybe 10 people walk on my side to even see my stuff and a few of those were fellow crafters. Most people that walked by our booth didn't even know I had a side.

A couple hours into it when some people started coming through, I mentioned to my cousin that people couldn't see my stuff and she offered to swap sides with me. Well, the other side had a big tree blocking half of it, so it didn't look like a good option. It was actually so obvious that I wasn't getting people that the crafter next to us came over and suggested that I put a couple things on the front table. After that, my cousin gave me a small bit of room to put two picture frames and a bookmark up front but by that time, our "rush" was over and I was ready to pack it up. When I do a craft show in the future, I'll be sure to stand up for room in the front because that's always the most reliable spot to bring people in.

I ended up selling one frame...to my cousin, which was nice of her. I told her that if she really wanted one, I could make one customized for her but she really liked one of them already made so she bought that. She ended up selling jewelry and a scarf to a couple of her family members that came by and she sold one necklace to a regular customer. The rest of what she sold was books from her garage sale pile and food that she had brought (pop and cookies). I looked around and none of the crafters were doing well. Looks like most of the sales went to the fleamarket items, which I guess I can understand in this economy. Us crafters aren't selling our stuff for dirt cheap because we're factoring in our time, effort, and cost.

There was a guy there selling homemade wooden bowls, etc and it was his first craft show too. We talked for a bit about our experiences and we're both going to try again in September. Since I'll have so much time to prepare, I'm going to come up with a whole smorgasbord of stuff and I'll be damned sure I get a decent display area. : )

So what went wrong? Here's what I think:

• Not many crafters so we didn't attract much of a crowd.
• They combined crafts and fleamarket stuff, which made the craft value go down.
• I didn't get a decent spot to display my product.
• The age of the crowd.
• The weather. Most people don't go out to craft shows when it's raining.

Now some pics for your viewing enjoyment. : )
The below pic is of my product where you can see that the view from the front was obstructed.

The below fountain was across the street from us. It's such a cute park.

This was a gazebo also across the street on the other side of the park. You can tell the craft show was in a small town!

This was a monument in the middle of the park side that we were in. Behind that is one of the historic homes that was on tour. Normally this home is an adult foster care facility.

UPDATE 6/25/2009: My cousin and I talked about the booth set-up and she ended up giving me some cash back from what I had paid for my portion of the booth. We now know better how to do things for next time!

Rain rain, all the day.

The forecast for tomorrow was for partly cloudy and a high of 75. Now it's a high of 69 and thunder and rain. The rain is supposed to start around 5am and continue through either noon or 5pm depending on the weather report. Hmm. So it'll be raining while we're setting up, through most of the craft show and maybe even through the end. Lovely. While it will be a good energy boost for me, the outlook of the show isn't looking so good. We shall see!

The bookmarks are done!

I finished the last bookmark yesterday afternoon. Yay! I put white backs on each of these so you don't see the cross-stitch "junk" and it makes for a nicer product. I only had time to make five but I figure five is a good amount for my first craft show considering I have a lot of other product to sell as well. If they sell like hotcakes, I'll know to make more for the next show. Again, keep in mind that this is a craft show in a conservative small town so everything is cute, not creepy. So that my blog post isn't bogged down with pics, I only gave ya' a couple close-ups. Tell me what ya' think of them! Oh yeah, and wish me luck on the show tomorrow!

Pale Goth Chick + Sunshine = Pink Goth Chick

We got a new sign at my workplace yesterday. You know, the kind with the big letters that goes out by the road? First, I was sent on a run to get folders to hold each of the letters/numbers. So off I go in my uniform with a big sign on my car (cuz' I'm a delivery driver). Staples was too expensive so I ended up at the dollar store. They didn't have enough of what we needed, of course. I called my manager and she said to try Walmart. I HATE Walmart but I'm not going to defy my manager so in I go. They don't have what we need either. I call my manager and she says to go back to Staples and just buy enough folders so that we're under $20. Alright, mission accomplished and I head back to the restaurant.

I told my manager that I wanted to help hang the letters/numbers up on the sign. I thought it would be fun! Nope. Maybe if we had a decent pole to get them up there but this one suctions and doesn't let go. Pain in the arse. So I proceed to spend the next half hour or so out in the sun getting the sign done. Our uniforms consist of pants, a short sleeve shirt and a hat. My poor pale arms and cheeks were quite pink when I got home that night. In fact, if I poke my arm right now, you can still see a white mark from my finger. Crap. Now I'm gonna' be tan and that just won't work for my goth look, ya' know? : )

On a lighter note...hee hee. I have been working my butt off this week to get things done in time for my craft show. I finished the bookmarks today and will be posting pics tomorrow. I also finished all of my cards. Yay! Now I'd just like to do this for awhile...

Picture courtesy of Cute Overload.

The frames are done!

Well, I hoped to do this post much earlier tonight but I ended up going out so here it is almost 1am. Better late than never, right? I haven't even made my blog rounds for the day!

So, my picture frames are done. Yay! Keep in mind that these are for a craft show in a very conservative area so they are cute, not creepy. Even though they aren't what I would normally do, I have to admit that I still like them. I mean, I wouldn't make something I didn't like, ya' know? So without further adieu, here they are! The first pic shows a general overview of all of them and then I added a couple close-ups for ya'. There is one that is much larger than the others. That is a cross-stitch that I did and then I put it in a frame, which I had slightly modified. You can still see the hoop rings in the fabric. I'm going to take it out of the frame and iron the crap out of it so hopefully they'll go away. I'm curious to see what you think of them!

On Friday, I'll be posting pics of the bookmarks I made.

Creative people rule!

I was out and about today running errands and picking up things I need for my craft show this weekend. As I was wandering down an aisle, I came across something so unique that I had to buy it. The person that came up with this idea is one creative genius and should be in charge of all designs going forward. They also had watermelons! In case you can't tell from the pic, the middle of the top comes off and that's where the Kleenex comes out. You can click on the image to make it bigger. (Had to say it cuz' some people don't know that.)


I give props to anyone that comes up with their own ideas. Things that haven't been done before. Creative people rule!

I'll be posting again tonight with finished frame pics!

Apparently I'm a spongy therapist.

My natural look is angry. I may be in a great mood but apparently I look like I'm scowling. If I had a nickel for each person who has told me to "smile", I'd be a very rich woman. Then I would proceed to wad those nickels up into plastic baggies that I could use to slug said people. :) A ghetto version of brass knuckles. Based on that information, you wouldn't think strangers would talk to me. They do. Grr. I bring a book with me when I have to go to an appointment that's going to be awhile. I'm buried in my book and without fail, someone will interrupt my reading and just start chatting about their day. WTF people?

Not only do strangers talk to me, they share personal information with me. Bizarre. I was sitting at a car dealership years ago (with my book) and this lady moves from across the room to sit next to me and then starts yapping about her kids. Then she starts telling me about her impending divorce. True story. Thirty minutes later my car was done and I got the heck out of there.

I was leaving work one day (my past job) and I ended up walking out with someone that I didn't know. She started talking about the weather and how she didn't have to rake the leaves this weekend (it was fall). I don't know why this person is talking to me but I ask why she doesn't have to rake the leaves this weekend. She tells me that she has breast cancer and her doctor said she had to be careful with how she moves. Why are you telling me this?!

I don't know what it is about me but people just want to spill their guts. It happens ALL THE TIME. I've heard the phrase "I've never told anybody this before" too many times to count. Maybe people sense that I'm an incredibly open-minded individual? Who knows. It's nice when friends want to open up to me though because it helps me to understand them better and can strengthen a friendship.

I honestly don't mind that people want to talk to me like that but it's hard because I just sit there and listen and offer some feedback. They don't care about me or my experiences. I'm just a soundboard. Now granted, I don't typically talk much during conversations anyways and do tend to be a bit secretive but gosh sometimes I get really sick of people that just want to talk about themselves all day! Seriously people, I should get paid for this. Hence the subject line of this post.

On that note...I found this the other day and had to share. Someday, I'm gonna' need to do this one!

Photo courtesy of StitchBitch. What a kickass name!

Here's another Lolcat for your enjoyment. This picture caption is so true! I have woken up with a sore neck/back due to this. Sad but true. : )

Gettin' crafty with it!

I'm not doing the Sunday Stealing this week cuz' it was all about hate. There are few things I truly hate and many things I really really really don't like. Maybe if the meme was about that, I'd do it. :)

I've been MIA for a couple days because I've just been so gosh darned busy with work and crafts! My first craft show is this Saturday and I've been focusing on getting things done for that. There is still much to do. I had said before that I had hoped to have some pics for you this weekend. Well, I do have progress pics but for reasons I'd rather not discuss, I don't want to show those. They're great pics but I'd rather wait and show you the finished product. As of this minute, I hope to have finished pics of the picture frames posted here on Tuesday and finished pics of the bookmarks on Friday.

So since I'm not giving you those pics, here are a couple other ones. Enjoy!

Before:

Don't you just love the smell of ripe peaches?

After:

Peaches with honey and pumpkin pie spice on top of a spongecake. Yum!

Giveaway winner announced!

So how many individual socks were in the drawer? Twenty-six! Unfortunately, most of you guessed too high on the sock drawer count. :( However, this was good for the person who DID win. Who won, you ask? Drumroll please...

Chris @ Frog on the Pumpkin

Congrats! Your giveaway and surprise gift will be along shortly. Enjoy!

One more day to enter to win my giveaway!

For those who haven't guessed, you have until tomorrow night to place your bets. : ) The winner will be announced Thursday morning. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, you can click on the goth dog tag in the upper right part of this page or click here.

For those who have guessed, thanks! Here are some cemetery pics that I've taken in the past, for your viewing pleasure.

Mini castle in a local cemetery. I love this!

In a cemetery near where I used to live in Ohio.

Also from Ohio. This little area was far away from all the other graves. Interesting.

This was taken somewhere in Ohio. I had pulled off the highway to check out a cemetery. There were five of these kinds of statues all in a circle.

The craft has been named and other good news.

I have been trying to come up with a name for the crafts I do because eventually I may start up an Etsy shop or something like that. Most of the names I've come up with aren't very clever and when I do an Internet search, sure enough, they've been used by others. I came up with one that I thought wouldn't be taken and it was, darn it. It was Hodge Podge Lodge. Cute, eh? Apparently that was also the name of a television show back in the day. I was trying to come up with something that isn't too weird so that it appears to the "normals" but that also reflects my darker personality and some of the darker crafts I may do.

Well, apparently my darker side just can't be covered up because I came up with a name and after searching the Internet, it appears that no one has used this. I have no idea how they haven't because I think it could be an obvious name. As of right now, the name I'm really digging for my crafts is "Crafts from the Crypt". Get it? Perfect, right? My dwelling can be crypt-like and it fits my personality. So none of you better take this because I'll come after you! Muwahaha! Seriously, I'm not joking people. I plan on designing business cards and I'll have a little coffin to keep them in. : )

Obviously this isn't a name that appeals to the normals so I'll be saving this for craft shows that aren't in conservative areas and my online endeavors.

Good news! In a recent post I talked about my segue into crocheting. Apparently I just can't learn stuff like this from books because I watched a two minute YouTube video and tada...I can crochet! Now that there is less than two weeks until my first craft show, I need to focus on the other things that I'm making. I plan on crocheting for the September show though. Yay! I should have some pics of my current crafts by this weekend.

A unique find.

I've blogged about designer dolls before but tonight I came across someone who makes art dolls. Her name is Lorell Lehman and she is based in Australia. I absolutely love the intricate details on her pieces of art. Take a look at a couple of the pieces from her Web site.

This is Pia. Her eyes are amazing and check out her cute dragon snail!

This is Hattie Cackles. My favorite part is her hat.

Lorell Lehman creates one of a kind creations. Pia has been sold but Hattie is still available according to her Web site. Hattie sells for around $846.00 US dollars. While the dolls are too pricey for my income, they are so unique that I would definitely buy one if my bank account would let me. : )

If you are interested in learning more about this artist or are curious to see what else she has created, please visit her Web site.