To post or not to post.

Prepare for a long but important and serious post.

When I started blogging, it was a way for me to talk about things that I couldn't discuss with people in my life. Issues I have with family, friends, personal parts of myself. It was an online diary. A place where I could truly be myself and not be judged. If someone didn't like my blog, they didn't have to read it. Most of my interests, my belief system and who I am is not mainstream. While some people enjoy what I have to talk about, others choose to mock and ridicule and I just don't want to deal with their negative backlash. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all and leave my blog, please.

You may have noticed that I don't talk much about friends and I've been keeping my blog a bit more on the surface than what I used to. There are many reasons for this. One is that I've come to realize that people I know in real life may visit my blog once in awhile. I wouldn't want them to be hurt by the way I feel about things even though it would be nice to talk to them about it. Unfortunately, I've tried talking to certain people in the past and they didn't want to discuss these things. Most people I know would rather pretend something never happened and move on. I'm the type that wants to talk things out and resolve them as long as both parties are being rational. I've been editing my past blog content to eliminate things that may hurt someone or bother them. I've saved all the info and may open a private blog someday to be able to talk about these things.

About two weeks ago, I had a situation happen with a fellow blogger. I wasn't going to mention it on here because I felt the best way to deal with the situation was to move on and not waste my energy on this negativity. Yesterday, this person decided to start stuff up again and now I feel like I have to address it here.

I won't be saying who it is or what blog is theirs because that's just starting trouble. I will say it's a "she" but that doesn't give anything away because most of my readers are female. Nothing I say in this post will attempt to give away their identity.

This person started out as a friend that I met through the blog world. Eventually we began to communicate through email, postal mail and by phone. After awhile, I realized this was not someone I wanted to be friends with. There were many reasons that I decided this and I won't talk about them here because I don't want to give away this person's identity. I'm not that mean. I had tried to talk to this person and explain some of the things that were bothering me. Unfortunately, they didn't understand where I was coming from and I knew that things would never change. It was at that point that I decided to just end the friendship. I did this through email clearly stating the reasons why I was doing it because I didn't want to end the friendship and not have them know why. I didn't feel that I was harsh but the email I got back shocked me.

She attacked my character, my art/crafts and things about me that I had shared on this blog. She swore, called me names, etc. It was not the response I was expecting. I thought we could handle this like adults but obviously not. Think about personal parts of yourself that you have only shared with a couple people. Now imagine those people mocking what you shared. It's a low blow and not necessary when it has nothing to do with why the friendship ended. I wish I could explain in words how cruel this person was trying to be to me.

I recently did a post on how short life is. I choose to rid myself of negative people/situations whenever it is possible. Life's too short to deal with the bullshit. This is why I wasn't even going to post about the situation at all. Yesterday, this person began posting anonymously on my blog. I had a feeling it was her because of the location that showed up in my Feedjit and she was typically coming from her blog. I responded to her comments cautiously, in case it was her. Then she emailed me last night and I knew for a fact it was her because the email address had her boyfriend's info in it. Plus the "story" that she tried to recreate for this anonymous identity didn't add up. I responded to that email carefully. I received an email back where she confirmed who it really was and then she proceeded to start attacking me again. I really wish I could show you all how horrible the emails were but I won't do that. It's catty and immature and would give away who this is. Needless to say, I have not and will not ever respond to her emails that are of that nature.

A couple weeks ago, when our friendship ended, she had said she would never visit my blog again. Well, I could tell that she was visiting based on Feedjit and then her anonymous postings happened and she also started deleting negative comments that she had left on my blog before. I know that she'll probably read this. If so, I want to say...

Just leave me alone! Please, move on and stop with everything. Stop attacking my character and making me into this person that I'm not. Enough with the lies. Please use your energy on more positive things. There are so many causes in the world that you could be spending your time and energy on. Our friendship is done and you know why so don't try to make it into something it's not. Just stop.