I had, what I considered, a good friend at my old job. We would go out for lunch, take breaks together, talk about stuff that was going on in our personal life, etc. She came over to my house once and I was invited to hers but I ended up canceling due to the awful winters we get here and the bad driving conditions it causes. Then we both got busy and I never ended up visiting her house. We were out shopping on our lunch one day and there was a CD that she was looking for but the store didn't have it. Her birthday was coming up so I scoured the stores around town, found it and bought it for her. We had funny nicknames for each other and everything. We were FRIENDS. When I left my last job, I had called her to let her know (it was her day off). She said that we'd keep in touch and that she felt bad for what happened to me. (I've posted in the past about the crap that went on there.)
I didn't hear from her for about a week so I emailed her to ask what was new. She emailed back and everything seemed okay. After I responded to that email, it took three days to hear back from her. That was my first clue that something was up. At the old job, you were in your email all day so I knew that she had gotten my email and just chosen not to respond. This past Monday, I sent her an email wanting to know what was going on. Finally today, she responded saying that our communications felt forced and that the main thing we had in common was working together. Wow. That completely stunned me. I emailed her back and said that if we were just co-workers, we wouldn't have been hanging out, I wouldn't have bought her a birthday gift, I wouldn't have had her come over, she wouldn't have told me that I was one of her best friends, etc. I told her that she wasn't sounding like the friend I had and that it made me sad and a little angry that our whole friendship was a fraud. I doubt I'll hear from her again but at least I got to the bottom of what was going on and was able to say the things I needed to say.
Now for the good news! I have an interview on Friday afternoon for the job I mentioned here. I really hope this one works out because working there would be so much fun it wouldn't feel like I'm working. That's the best type of job!
Eve over at Through Eve's Looking-Glass has a photo game called In "Other" Words where you post a picture of something that you found interesting/amusing/unique. She prefers that you take the picture and then explain it or say what it means to you. My picture below is part of my living room. I love decorating my home with unique things. When I moved in, there were nails already in the wall that were in the perfect location for my spider web. Sometimes my decorating style can be a bit spooky but I feel right at home. : )
If you want to participate, please visit Eve's blog here and add your info to Mr. Linky.
8 comments:
people never fail to amaze me. being a part of the species that is known for intentionally hurting "their own" can be a little bit of a downer sometimes.
:( sorry to hear about that.
but, like you said, now you know. and you can move on. still... it sucks.
PLEASE update as soon as you get back from your interview!! crossing my fingers! and my toes! and my eyes too, if that'll help!
i likey your spider web!
People are funny that is for sure. When I worked, I did give a B-Day gift to co-workers even though we weren't *True Friends.* And some feel that you are friends due to working together.
I am learning myself, though, to trust my instincts more when it comes to people. To me, *Friend* has always been a strong word. I have lots of acquaintances, but friends are hard to come by.
Follow your heart girl!
Diane - I will never understand the human species. Especially those of us who don't say what they mean and lead fake lives.
You're crossing your eyes too! Don't get a headache because of little ol' me! I'm hoping to do an update when I get back on Friday but I have company coming that night so I might not be able to until later that night. I'll probably do a quick post tomorrow about the company coming.
Dreamwriter - I've got what you have...lots of acquaintances.
Thanks to both of you for commenting on this. You brightened my day!
I love you spider web! :)
If it makes you feel any better about your decorating style, I had a huge plastic crow that I lovingly called Trent in my house for YEARS. I finally let him go when I moved last (mainly because his glued-on feathers were falling off).
I'm sorry to hear about your ex-friend...people can be ginormous jerks. :(
I'm sorry to hear that about your old 'friend.' That's a terrible thing to tell someone. (As you know I've had my share of crappy friends, so I've been there girlie!) Try not letting it bother you (I know easier said than done)...it's her loss. You are a great lady! If she can't see that then why bother with her!??!
Thanks for playing, yay! Your decorations are great. Spiderweb & the candles are lovely.
Take care & be chatting with you later.
TwasTheBrillig - I think I have a crow like the one you described. : ) His wings are all intact though so he'll be sticking around for awhile.
Eve - Thanks for saying I'm a great lady. : ) I treat people like I want to be treated so it really irks me when someone is so fake. I wonder why she acted like she was my friend for so long? Oh well.
It's so disheartening when people seem to value a friendship less than you do. On a brighter note, good luck with your interview. Hope it works out!
Halloween - That's exactly it. I valued our friendship more than she did. I'm really careful about who I let into my life and it bothers me when I feel like I've made a bad judgment call.
Thanks for wishing me luck on my interview!
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